It's A Fucking Scarf

Dear Jay Severin (& other Conservo-puppets),

Firstly, I completely understand why you are on the radio. You are a horrible elfishly ugly excuse for a human. I'm appalled at your face, but I'm disgusted by what you say and how you speak. Secondly, when you speak I can hear the clicking of your tongue and saliva from the back and sides of your mouth, and it churns my stomach. I dislike you more than I dislike Michele McPhee. I have collected data, however, on how well a host speaks versus how good looking a host is, on your station:

X is Ugly(Face) and Y is Beauty(Voice)

Math... it adds up, bitches!

Jay, I see that you are a full 24+ hours late to the puppet party. You found that it is now your turn to give Dunkin' Donuts and Rachel Ray hell for being TERRORIZTZ (that's an internet terrorist, because the internet automagically replaces S's with Z's)! But you didn't just play the role of an unforgiving ignoramus, pushing stupidity to all of your listeners... you took this opportunity to propagate pure hatespeech. Pure and unrelenting hatespeech. You did an awesome job at making sure you didn't get fired though. I see what you did there. You quoted something you referred to as "Amos and Islam", and as of now, I cannot find the source of this. But you used this writing to propagate hatred by quoting it and making clear you don't disagree with it. Presumably to save your own ass from being fired, as you pointed out almost happened the last time you did this.

In your re-reading you quote such things as making it OK to strip search, randomly scrutinize, deport and jail any Middle Eastern looking person. Why? As you put it, not quoting, so they could go back to where they came from and tell their kids to be nice to white people. Why? Because they are overwhelming us in their "demography" by "reproducing" way more. They are politically taking over, as you put it. Your "source" at the FBI informed you, and you thankfully informed us, that there are way more Jihadists than we can imagine in this country, hiding, being harbored, and about to bomb Fenway Park.

You propogandick. You use sensational tactics like pointing out how me and my family will become victims of murderous, ruthless Islamists, and then follow it by telling me it will be at Fenway Park (like 7 fucking times), and most likely on opening day (by the way, that was a while ago). You are sick and twisted, Jay.

You make me so angry that I haven't even gotten to the fucking scarf.

And to display your proud and seemingly limitless knowledge of Islamic and Middle Eastern societies, practices and laws - you made it clear that they ALL (as you put it), think women are less than donkeys. You followed that on the coattails of Amos' explanation about how Islamic culture excludes half the worlds population - women. NO WRONG FAIL! Some, not all still limit the activity of women in utterly disgusting ways. Not all. Not even close. And by the way - "they" aren't the only ones.

You then follow this with a story you read in the NY Post (Times?) about a Belgian woman, who is a "Muslim Extremist". She doesn't bomb or kill on her own, she uses the internet (now with more than 100 websites!) to preach and spread the hatred of Al-Qaeda. This "disgusting pig" as you put it, is a shame, and the NY Post (Times?) should reveal where she lives, so that... "special forces can invade this pigs home, extract all the information they can from her and shoot her dead on the spot."

You put the ass in class, Jay. Because clearly, the only people in the world calling for the death of people unlike them on the behalf of religion is Al-Qaeda, right? Definitely not these folks. Or these, or them or this guy. No one else - ever in the history of anything.

So how did we get here, Jay? Because Rachel Ray wore a scarf in a Dunkin' Donuts commercial. And because you're 24+ hours behind every other lunatic. You are such a puppet. You're from New York, but you said that Dunkin' Donuts has the best bagels you've ever had.

Look, I've been to New Jersey, and even they have better bagels than Dunkin' Donuts, so I'm going to assume that if New Jersey can make awesome bagels, New York must, by association of greasy haired-open shirted assholes, make better bagels than Dunkin' Donuts. You're so proud of Dunkin' Donuts and the actions they took to take the ad away - because it was just outright "distasteful and offensive". Stick to baking cookies with the other elves. They don't have scarves.

Well Jay, I've done some research for you. I found those terrorists in America you're talking about:
It's a fucking invasion, Jay.

I want this ad back in the interwebz as fast as possible. I hate Rachel Ray - she's annoying - but she has the right to wear any fucking scarf she feels like when pushing caffeine and hashbrowns into my face.

Apparently these are one the of issues I should be concerned with: American's with scarves.

whatishappening?,
-Derek

PS: I apologize for not having linked the sources of what was being read - I can't find them. If anyone can find them, I'll link them immediately (NY Post, Amos).

EDIT: Dr. Momentum's got a take on this business. However, it managed to escape the blogodome (think Tina Turner, inter-tubes, and cats the spell things incorrectly) and it hit the radio waves.

2 comments:

Dr. Momentum said...

LOL, Derek.

I got home, checked the web, saw this story and then my head exploded.

I see yours did, too.

Dr. Momentum said...

Now that I've had time to fully digest this horrible situation, I realize it's much worse than I thought.

I can't believe the terrorists have infiltrated the Straight Talk Express.

Clearly, all good Republicans need to vote for Bob Barr.